Wednesday, June 9, 2010


Yes, I said Drainless, not brainless...LOL

I had the last of my remaining drains pulled today. Ahhhhhh... Can you hear the relief? How do you spell relief? For me, it's D-R-A-I-N-L-E-S-S!! That means tomorrow I can take a long, warm, luxurious shower...I'll have one week of heavenly showers until the next surgery. I plan on staying in there a long, LONG, L-O-N-G time!!! No more weird sensations under my skin, no more emptying these silly things twice a day (I'm sure my live-in nurse, DH, is happy about this too!!), no more cleaning around the entry site, no more bandages under my clothing, no more sponge baths!!! Amazing what a little thing like taking a shower means when you've been without one for two full weeks!! *Doing the happy dance*!!

I visited my Plastic Surgeon today, he pulled the two remaining drains, then TRIED to set up an appointment next week to start filling the tissue expanders....and then I told him about my next surgery. I guess he hadn't gotten the pathology report, and I think he was as shocked as everyone else was, that they had found cancer in the sentinel nodes, three of the five removed had metastatic cancer cells. *sigh* So....he postponed that appointment for three weeks.

DH and I then went for a heavenly lunch at the Cheesecake Factory. Am I spoiled or what? I was sooooo good, I had the soup and salad lunch....and then I was sooooooooo bad, I had the Kaluah cocoa coffee cheesecake! Well I was partially good, I scraped off all the whipped cream LOL That counts for something doesn't it? Oh it was sinfully good!!!

Next we toddled around the Westfield Mall until it was time for the Medical Oncologist appointment, and then my day got really interesting. *HEAVY SIGH* I learned that because the cancer had spread to the sentinel nodes that not only would I have to have chemotherapy....and THEN radiation....I would have to have hormone therapy for possibly 10 years. 10 years...that keeps echoing around in my head. That's not 10 years from this moment, it's 10 years from the time radiation ends. Radiation doesn't begin until chemotherapy ends. *pregnant pause* What began as a simple operation and a few cosmetic perks, has turned into a marathon session that I wasn't expecting. Each day brings a few more months and now a few more years to the treatment process. All I can say is this... The Lord does not give you more than you can handle, and He knew that I would not be able to handle all this news at the very beginning. He has been giving me little bits here and there, giving me moments to catch my breath and internalize each bit of information. He's been holding my hand, helping me to catch my breath, and walking me through this whole process. Whether I make it to the end of all this with my mind and what's left of my body intact or not, I feel well cared for and loved by my Master. Am I scared? You bet! Who wouldn't be?!?! Am I ready to fight? Absolutely! Can I sleep tonight with all this rattling around in my head? Absolutely NOT! LOL Ah well, tomorrow is another day. I'm having an appointment with the home health nurse at 11 and then a friend is coming over to cross stitch at 12. I'm blessed with good friends!

I came home again today to find flowers at my doorstep...LOL I laugh because I've only received flowers a few times in my lifetime, and I think I've had more flowers in the past couple of months than I have had in the previous 49 years! Thank you Peggy and Bob, they are absolutely gorgeous! Pink and Purple, two of my favorite colors! It's been amazing how they've been scattered at such a rate, that as soon as one bouquet has to be removed, another one takes it's place! Just knowing I have all these people praying for me and supporting me is helping me to keep things in prospective and to keep moving confidently forward to face whatever needs facing at the moment. I'm truly blessed!! Thank you all so very much!

Off to see if I can catch some zzzz's. I have to be up early to take my shower before DH leaves for work (and he leaves VERY early in the morning). Wish me luck in the sleep department! LOL Good night! *Hugs*


lynda said...

I hope you were able to get some sleep! Sorry that the news from your doctor wasn't better and that you've got more treatments to look forward to, but your attitude is amazing and with that, and all the support you have from family and friends, you'll take every step, one at a time and be fine.
You're in my thoughts and prayers daily. Enjoy that shower!

Babs said...

HI DJ! first I laugh, then I cry, then I laugh again, re-read what you just wrote then always end with a prayer. what a trooper you are, and a blessing to anyone who is keeping up with you. Wish I was there to stitch along with you and your friend, but for now, just a hug and a prayer.

Carolyn NC said...

Praying for you, DJ, as you face each day. Hugs!